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Home > Blog > What Defines an Icky Person?
Out of Our Minds
Thursday, March 02, 2006 8:48 PM
What Defines an Icky Person?
Anita Sharpe on Life

The names on my own 'icky' list are those who treat badly, or with less respect, people whom they deem less important than they are (i.e., restaurant servers, support staff, etc.).

What about you: are you embarrassed or offended if you go out to dinner with someone who lambasts a waiter or talks condescendingly to their corporate subordinates?



7 comments

Monica Ricci - 6/5/2006 3:05:45 PM
I have a friend who always says "You're so nice to strangers". Uhhhh well duh. Why shouldn't I be? It's just how I am. Until someone gives me a reason to treat them with anything other than courtesy and basic respect, I will. You have a choice when you interact with others... you can be crappy or you can be kind and being kind takes less energy than being crappy.
Erin - 3/10/2006 6:33:07 PM
My very own father did a very icky thing when he started making repeated lewd comments to a waitress at a restaurant where we were dining with my boyfriend. The first lewd comment I could have just blown off albeit with a bit of embarassment, but soon every time this waitress came to our table my dad said something awful. Finally, after his comments had solicited the word 'ENOUGH!' out of the waitress, I had him walk out of the restaurant with me when I went to get cash, and asked him, 'do you always treat women that way? It's a wonder you've never been sued. I don't think I can ever go back to that restaurant again.' Dejected, my dad hung his head and the sparkle went out of his eye. He really didn't mean any harm, I know, but he just didn't have decent BOUNDARIES. It doesn't make it any less despicable... but I couldn't help feeling guilty after berating him like that, my own father. Where does this ickiness come from??
PaulaZT - 3/6/2006 1:38:40 PM
My question is, what can I say to my icky companion that would have them rethink what they just did and not feel belittled at the same time? It's easy to tell them that they are slime for mistreating human beings or to say nothing and throw one's hands in the air.
What about a pointed, If you have a complaint, complain to someone who can do something about it.
Or a humourous, I can tell you've never had to work as a waitperson. ;o)
Or finally a heartfelt, How can I support you in finding a way to have these little things not get under your skin?
These are all ideas. I'm not sure how comfortable I would be in saying any of them.
Janet Auty-Carlisle - 3/5/2006 10:31:33 AM
I am always reminded of the phrase 'There but for the Grace of God go I.' Nobody is less or more important than anybody else and everybody deserves respect regardless of their job or stature. Service jobs are hard, long hours and under-valued...nobody should be served an order of dis-respect simply because they work where they do....living la vida fearless, Jan
Frank - 3/4/2006 11:28:56 AM
What about icky people who use your comments section just to get a plug in for their own web site. Eeeew.

Double icky just for having done it in a post about icky people.
victor - 3/3/2006 5:11:48 AM
Well said. I totally agree with you. The point you are making here does mean a lot. http://www.backpainworld.info
Phil Gerbyshak - 3/2/2006 10:22:49 PM
Absolutely! If someone is rude to those serving you, they have no business getting served! I get very embarrassed when those I am with make a big deal out of nothing, though I am equally embarrassed when they make snide remarks just loud enough for the server to hear them, but not so loud that anyone can fix the problem.

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